| | *gasp* Its a real update!!
Yeah haven't updated in a while because I haven't had anything to write about. well now I do. My own negativity has screwed me again last week when over the weekend I decied that since I wouldn't ever get in a real relationship with Aubry I would try to forget those feelings, move on and just be happy were friends. It worked with miss Squeak in eighth grade so it will work again just fine right. Wrong! Cause after being asked out by some random adorible girl (Emily) I go to choir to tell Aubry and learn that she was having flowers sent to my house in order to ask me to WPA. And that she is interested in getting to gether but not untill she's shure her body wont kill her...
Then I find out that Emily is a frosh, which I didn't think she was (I thought she was at least a sophmore) and normaly to years isn't that big of a deal but to me, right now, it's a bailing cord. As adorable as the girl is, I don't feel anything beyound like and can't really see my feelings going beyond that.
We've already said we're girlfriends but how can it be a relationship when you know nothing about each other and your still belongs to another no matter what your mind has decided.
Fith day dealing with the plauge that I finally gave up going to school with on thursday. I feel shaky and achy and so tired that I can't sleep. If I lay down on my back my legs feel strange and my eyes won't shut for more then a moment or so. If I lay on my side my stomach feels like I'm going to hurl so I fall asleep with the mantra 'please don't let me throw up' over and over again. I feel like my soul is floating in my body and the two are only attached by threads or like I'm under cold water and can't will myself up for air.
I'm on a diet of toast that I broke yesterday so I thought I had gotten better only to feel sick again today. I reaally hate this. It's like constantly being on the verge of tears but my tears are gone so I keep falling a little farther away. My head really hurts.
I never got the flowers by the way. Nor did I go to WPA.
Hopefully ragdoll will send me my drawings soon
Insanely, plague riddenly yours
karen
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| | Posted 2/12/2007 4:47 PM - 6 Views - 8 eProps - 4 comments
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